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January 26, 2012
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Bones crackling over skin.
Mournful optimist after a mercy killing.
The living dead scream sweet sorrow.
Idiotic Wisdom betrays an open secret.
Blood flooding the streets.
Cruel happiness makes for sweet pain.
The killer staring at the moon with yellow eyes.
This was a poem that I did in Sophomore Year for my english class. never thought it would be published in the school literary book. That feeling was so amazing.
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:iconstarhood:
starhood Jul 1, 2012   Writer
very interesting, intense use of oxymoron to tell the story. I really enjoy how the only two lines without oxymoron, the very literate-sense ones are the first and last lines. They really set an atmosphere and they're very solid images, while the rest (and most) of the poem is more abstract and open to interpretation - you combine the two styles well. I'm not sure about repeating the "adjective+noun" structure so much, especially in more common phrases such as "sweet sorrow" or "sweet pain". Others are simply brilliant, such as "mournful optimist", "mercy killing", or "open secret". Anyway, I'm not surprised this got published either. I like how you keep it short and still make an impact with your words.
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:iconsaintslove:
saintslove Jun 20, 2012  Professional Writer
I believe it would be published, it's really well-done, no extra pointless words so that the impact is stronger.
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:iconpenguinnpita:
Penguinnpita Jun 21, 2012  Student Artisan Crafter
Thank you (:
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:iconsaintslove:
saintslove Jun 21, 2012  Professional Writer
You're welcome :)
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